DAY SIXTY NINE - WEIGHT LOSS, STRESS & HAIR!!

Howdy Doody friends. I am writing this blog to try to update all of you. I have been so very busy at work and with my personal life that I just haven't had time to write or even look at the computer. Let's start with the weight cause I know you all want to know....I have lost 119 lbs and counting. I had to go buy some clothes finally as everything was falling off, pants, shirts, underwear and bras. I got some nice new clothing, 2 dresses, 2 bras, 2 pants,and a few shirts. Next on the agenda is STRESS yes I know we all have it but somehow mine just seems to multiply. I am stressed about our finances as my husband is still not back to work but we just got word about an hour ago that he will start back on Monday....thank the Good Lord!!!! Now hopefully I can catch up on my mortgage. Next is work.....my work is based on mail....we receive a majority of our claims via the mail system....we have a damn postal strike going on. I have been pulled to work on another team to help out (partly I believe because my team doesn't have enough work). The stupid postal crap better be over soon as it is driving me crazy. The more stress I have the more my hair falls out and the more my hair falls out the more stressed I get. I have probably lost 50% of my hair. Now thank goodness going into this I had really thick hair or I'd be in big trouble right now. The mess on my pillow in the morning is disturbing to say the least. The texture and elasticity of my hair has changed...or should I say is dead. I understood that there would be some hair loss but I guess I was not prepared for the amount of hair loss. The doctor says it will continue to to fall out for close to the next six months.....this is an issue. He saws I won't go bald but I am doubting that at this point. In a panic I went online and ordered myself a wig or two. They are beautiful but they are hot and the ribbing can rub and cause irritation. I know that there is cancer patients all over the world that wear wigs and I am sorry for sounding so damn selfish but it really does upset me. I know that it will eventually grow back. I will begin a vitamin supplement next week and that should help with feed protein to my hair and nails a little more, but it will slow down the weight decline. I have about another 100 to 115 lbs I would like to lose (and never find again). My fingernails have peeled right down to the skin and bleed on occasion so I covered em up...that's right pretty fake nails! I am not a vain person in the sense of wanna look better than others, but I cannot look bad, hair chunks, bald spots and yukkie nails. I don't want to be that person that some toddler points at and says "mommy whats wrong with her" or "why does she look like that". I know it sounds so bad but It is a panic that is weighing heavy on me. I work so hard to lose weight to feel and look better and then this comes along. I have not been in a very good frame of mind lately (probably good thing I didn't write a blog) as my parents always said "If you don't have something nice to say don't say anything" I am sure that my family has taken the brunt of my misery. It will be a terribly long summer if I cannot find some happiness somewhere. I think and am hoping that once the vitamins start that I will feel better as I seem to be tired right now. I am having blood work done next week and will see where all the levels of iron, potassium, etc are and if I need to take extra vitamins. I am excited that I have gone from a size 32 to a size 22 pant and I bought pants at a normal store for the first time in years. I went to the movies with my husband last week and had to text all my friends as it was the first time in 20 years that I sat comfortably in a theatre seat without my legs being squished to the point they fall asleep or are so sore and numb when the movie is over that it kills me to walk out of the theatre. It was my anniversary this week and my husband and I went to Boston Pizza for a light lunch. I sat in a booth that a year ago I couldnt fit into and had to change to a table and chairs. I know they may sound like small things to some people but it is huge to me. I am happy with the weight loss and I would encourage anyone who is looking at surgery not to hesitate. Some of the little road bumps along the way are trying but remember the road you are on takes you to a fabulous destination! Hope this updates everyone and that everyone is well. Big hugs to my dear coworker Miss Kake (she loves cake wrecks.com) as she is going through a terrible family crisis. Please know that there are friends that you can call on and if you need anything I am here! Take good care Miss Kake and you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Steph